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Need a more shocking and obscure counterculture? Try Zoophilia!
Posted by: | CommentsIs it just me, or does the general attitude of the Zoophile community come off a bit pretentious? They’re all like…”What? You think it’s weird that I blow horses? Fucking SQUARE. That’s how I roll. Who the hell are you to judge? “
Its 2010, man. Get with it you Neo-McCarthyist prick. You probably think women shouldn’t be allowed to vote either, don’t you? Homosexuality is not even slightly controversial anymore, and even hermaphrodites and transsexuals can hardly cause a stir these day. So here come the Zoo’s. And they want rights. And attention.
Look at me! Look at me! I Loooooove horsies! GittyUp!
If you’re not hip to the lingo, a Zoophile is exactly what it sounds like: someone who fucks animals. Zoo’s would probably beg to differ with me on that definition though. It seems they like to define themselves as “People who love animals more than most” or “people who identify and feel a special connection with animals”. By that definition, anyone who thinks their dog is an “old soul” or enjoys an Animal Planet marathon is a zoophile.
Most vegetarians like myself would be considered zoophiles. Anyone who supports PETA is a zoophile. Bullshit. Unlike other animal lovers, zoophiles all share a very specific defining quality that sets them apart: they have sex with them.
Ask a zoo what their scene is all about, and they will almost certainly leave out the part about dog or horse cock. But that is what makes them Zoo’s. If you don’t actually fuck them, then sorry, you’re not a zoo. Get back in line with the rest of us plain vanilla animal friendly folk.
Zoophilia is going mainstream. And I think it’s hilarious.
Dogs seem to be the “gateway drug” and horses are the heroin. Like heroin, you had better be careful with that shit. A little too much will kill you.
I was on a date yesterday with a psychology major with a particular interest in sexual deviancy. And whenever a girl says that one of her main interests is “sexual deviancy” within the first ten minutes of the first date, I usually go ahead and see that one through. I’d write an FR about it, but it was pretty cut and dry. No lines, no routines, no seduction tactics. We hung out at a 24 hour starbucks until about 4am. She had to be at class at 7am. When I said “come over right after class. You won’t need your wits about you. Plus, you can take a nap there.” It was pretty well understood what was going down.
If you haven’t noticed, my seduction style is pretty straight forward. I don’t’ use much trickery. When I do, it is in only to veil the very obvious sub-communication. Anyway, after our own demonstrations of sexual deviancy, we got back on that topic and started watching the movie “Zoo”. This is a movie about the guy who went and got himself fucked to death by a horse. Interesting premise for a documentary. I had preconceived notions. I had questions.
The film did, however, leave many of my questions unanswered. And what was certainly meant to be at least something of a plea for zoophile acceptance kind of message, left me with mixed messages. I think all this rhetoric about “being in touch with animals” (pun accidental, but intended) is a bunch of whitewashing denial.
A huge part of my personal philosophy is being absolutely unashamed of and real with yourself. And for zoos to carry on like they are just more in tune with nature- more sophisticated and empathetic than the rest of us, is nothing more than them skirting the whole “horse dick” issue.
Hey, if horse dick is your thing, by all means have at it. I am not in the camp that is crying “animal cruelty” here at all. I’ll get to my opinion on that in a sec…But while banging hooved beasts isn’t my thing, if it’s yours then by all means, have at it. Just don’t act like it’s about something that it isn’t. Fine, bang a horse, film it and put it on ZooTube, but don’t go acting like a pompous asshole about it.
The general vibe I get from the literature I have read in the last few hours on the subject of zoophilia- they all talk about this over-sensitive, sacrificial “doing it for the animal” kind of devotion. What a crock of shit. Fess up to your bizarre paraphilia and stop lying to yourself. In every case scenario, I think that lying to yourself is dangerous. It does horrific damage to your psych. Embrace that shit. Enjoy your subculture status. There is already a subculture of animal rights activists and animal lovers- we just don’t fuck them.
And enough with all this nonsense about “giving the animal the gift (of your asshole)”, as if it is a purely altruistic deed. As if you’re taking one for the team. Get over yourself. I would be willing to bet that in 99% of all horsefucking incidents, there was a female horse not too far away. He would have just gone over and put it in her instead. And that would have been great for both parties involved since her vagina is capable of handling that sort of thing.
You think you’re some kind of delicacy? Your tight little human ass is some kind of rare treat? Come on now. Don’t lie. Your choice to oil up your butt and have your spotter come help you out had very little to do with your loving desire to pleasure the horse. The horse would have been just fine with banging another horse.
I do not have to guesstimate the size of this horses business because (of course) these guys videotaped the incident. (yes, I will include a link at the end. Sicko…) The guy in the movie had about 12 horses. They clearly preferred this one because it was the biggest.
Another thing, If you watch the video, which of course you will, you will notice another dead give-away that pleasuring the horse out of lovey-dovey sentiment was not of anyone’s main concern. Look at the strange spiky piercings on the guys balls. He has at least 3 of these. This is a pretty clear indication that he was into masochism at least a little bit. So enough with all the romanticism. This guy just wanted to be stretched out by a horse.
Mr. Hands was known in the community for distributing videos of his animal conquests online. Here in the real world, if I say I fuck my girlfriend because I love her so much that I want to give her the gift of intimate connection and pleasure….and then I film it unbeknownst to her, and sell tapes of it online so others may get off to it, people would rightfully call that a contradiction.
Interestingly enough, this guy was an engineer for Boeing. It would seem that an engineer would take note of the simple physics of the situation. There’s this one part in the movie where one of the guys says something like “you gotta be careful when you walk through the barn, otherwise the animals will mount you”…what bullshit. As you see in the video, these guys need the assistance of a buddy to get the dick in there. Nothing casual about it. Penetration couldn’t possibly even occur without assistance. If it simply tried to mount you, it would do nothing but knock you over.
Anyway, before I end my tirade, I feel that it wouldn’t be right to write what is most likely my only piece on zoophilia without throwing in my two cents on what seems to be the other major issue of hot debate on the topic…
Is it animal cruelty?
My opinion, as an animal friendly vegetarian…NO. I cannot see how this is cruel to the animals. As far as the consensual/non-consensual debate…Shut the fuck up. Consensual sex is an entirely HUMAN concept and does not apply to animals. This is a pretty important point that a lot of people don’t seem to get. In the animal world there is no such thing as consensual sex. The alpha male kicks the shit out of the beta male and takes the pussy. There is no “but she’s only 15” or “I’m not in the mood” in the animal kingdom.
I’ve seen people debate this argument with weak retorts like “like a child, an animal cannot reason like a human adult, and therefore cannot consent to sex”. Seriously? Like a child? You talk about them like they’re retarded. These are full grown animals. In this case, a full grown Arabian stallion. This horse will put his dick wherever he damn well pleases. Animals don’t beg for sex. They don’t ask for fucking consent. They don’t feel “dirty” or ashamed after sex or develop issues as to whether or not they “deserved to be treated like that” The sooner people get over their psychotic complexes about sex and recognize it for what it is, the sooner we can all stop living in a constant state of backwards ass illusion and move forward as a species.
And to anyone who’s confused, no this isn’t about a hate rant about my intolerance towards those of an alternative lifestyle. I am giving them shit because of their obnoxious, misleading and pretentious stance about their cause.
Flash the Church Lady
Posted by: | CommentsSo, here’s a funny little thing that happened earlier this afternoon. I’m walking into Whole Foods when out in the parking lot, this skinny blonde guy passes me coming out of the store. I see him coming at me and I’m thinking “where do I know this guy from?” He’s got this little smirk on his face. Wearing a yellow plaid shirt, and has this sort of aging hipster/ rock star fashion mullet thing going on with his hair. I’m wearing sunglasses so i get a nice long gander at him as he’s coming towards me. “I knowwww you” I says to myself. I still couldn’t quite pin it down.
I had also just made a comment to my buddy about one of those boxy brown cars…you know the one…not sure who makes them. They’re like the Honda element but smaller, boxier and goofier. I was reminiscing about a girl i used to date who drove one…I audibly called it a goofy car and remember thinking “I hope this hipster guy doesn’t get into that one” since he probably heard me just say it was goofy. And then I’d feel bad. And I just got a bitchin’ haircut and got a free badass robe with purchase of some goddamned tea tree pomade so I would hate to have something kill my mood like having to feel bad about making fun of this guys car.
Especially since he had this real cool swagger. I don’t remember him carrying any groceries.
Anyways. This all happened in like 4 seconds…so he gets closer and closer and now I’m just trying to get a good look and figure out how I know this guys face. I don’t live in LA or anything so it’s not expected to see a lot of celebrities. I’m thinking maybe he is in a band I know that is playing in town or something. He’ll he might just be a bartender i saw the other night. Or a year ago. Who knows. I’m perplexed.
And when I’m perplexed, I tend to bite my cheek a bit. And you know that face you make when you bite your cheek…
He finally walks right past me- and as he does- perplexed- I bite my cheek.
And he looks at me with this extremely familiar smile / smirk and gave me a very pleasant “Haha..yep.” as he struts past. Luckily he gets into the car next to the brown boxy goofcar.
And about two seconds after he said that, as im walking into the store, it hits me. Of course! That was motherfucking Dana Carvey. Only my very favorite SNL cast member for my entire goddamned childhood…
And he said “Haha…yep” because I was biting my cheek, and he must have thought I was flashing him the “Churchlady” face. So he chuckled to acknowledge my gesture of recognition and said “yep” like, “yeah It’s me…dana carvey…churchlady…and all your other favorite SNL skits from back in the day.”
But instead of recognizing who it was and saying something stupid like “Ohhh, It’s Dana Carvey!” or “Party on Wayne…” or bust out with singing “Choppin’ Broccoli” or any other silly catch phrase you might be tempted to blurt out when seeing an old school SNL cast member passing you in a parking lot….I ACCIDENTALLY flash him the most subtle one of all….the churchlady face.
“well, isn’t that special?”… golden.
When it came together and I realized what I had just happened it really made my day.
Then I see my sister and I’m all like “Dude, so check it out, I just accidentally flashed Dana Carvey the Churchlady face in a parking lot- I didn’t even know it was him- but i was biting my cheek like a neurotic idiot…”
And then she was all…”That’s HILARIOUS….Hey remember that guy Eric Longoria?”
“yeah, I actually just ran into him at Bronx the other night. We caught up a bit”
“I just got a text message saying he died in his sleep last night…”
Shit. That’s the second person I know now who has died in their fucking sleep. Sorry to switch gears on you here…but shit.
Now i’m laying here at almost 4am…writing because, well…I’m having a hard time sleeping now. I never have a hard time sleeping.
I know that’s everyone’s preferred way to go…but I’m pretty sure when people say they hope they die in their sleep, they aren’t talking about in their mid twenties. That’s pretty haunting.
So…another awesome day soured by the startling realization that you can always just die for no reason at all and not even know it.
Sleep tight 
Several Extended Michael Jackson Metaphors
Posted by: | CommentsI was trying to decide between seeing “2012″ or “The Boondock Saints II” … Standing there…oogling at the red flashing dots on the marqui, when i think to myself “Chat, you dumb son-of-a-bitch. You haven’t seen ‘Michael Jackson’s This Is It’ yet.”
Says the same guy who would rent “Moonwalker” several times in the same month as a child. Says the same guy who wore a WHITE fingerless glove on his left hand- complete with masking tape around his fingertips!- through a good portion of grade school.
Sure fingerless gloves were all the rage back then. But everyone else wore them on both hands, and they were usually black. I wore mine on my left hand. And it was white. I was making a statement. A bold, loud and proud statement. And that statement was “Michael fucking Jackson”
I remember as a kid, I modeled my walk (regular forward walking) after the way Michael Jackson would walk through a croud of screaming fans. You know what i’m talking about…that pop/step kind of bounce-walk, where he would pop up a bit on his toes with each step. It was a dramatic and confident walk. It was a walk that commanded attention, like a real superstar. I copped that walk as a child. So to this day, I have to credit my swagger to MJ
I can even credit my very first date to Michael Jackson.
Kind of an interesting story…heres the short version.
I had just turned seven years old. I was at a new school and needed to make some new friends. My parents threw me what will most likely always remain “my most memorable birthday party”. I had all the kids there and there was a limosine parked in the driveway. We were told that there would be a surprise guest. Everyone was trying to see who was in the limo through the tinted windows. No one could see anything.
The suspense was building. Speculation occurring. I had no idea.
My mother was working at a fitness magazine, so I was thinking it was an athlete or something. Eventually the doors opened…and out came Michael Jackson. Or THE most convincing Michael Jackson impersonater you could imagine. I mean this guy was for real. He must have actually had a few nose jobs and bleached his skin a bit.
He turned my bedroom into a wardrobe room for all his costumes that he somehow suck back there. These little kids were all actually getting down on the living room/dance floor. He would throw a smoke bomb and come Moonwalking out of the cloud wearing an entirely new costume. Had all the moves down perfectly. I remember, he even did the one that was so contraversial at the time…thats right…the crotch grab/howl. Right there in front of a bunch of kindergarteners. It was brilliant.
Of course, as much as I wanted to believe that this was actually Michael Jackson at my birthday party, there was the nagging sense that it probably wasn’t. Either way, at 7 years old…this was WAY better than a clown or something. I was trying to suspend disbelief.
More importantly, that party gave me a social status boost. And I met the girl who would be my very first crush/ puppylove girlfriend. I went from unknown new kid, to being somewhat popular. Everyone knew me now, and it got everyone talking. “Oh, you weren’t there? Guess what you missed? Motherfucking Micheal Jackson showed up.”
She came up to me and said, with classic hot-chick snobbishness, something like “Everyone thinks that you really had Michael Jackson at your birthday party, but I know it was a fake.” Even then I liked a sassy woman, intent on giving me some shit. I I returned with “So what? It was a good time and everyone had fun. Let them think it was real. No use in spoiling it for everyone”
And that was my first experience with
That mixture of enamorment and intimidation. In awe of her, and amazed by the fact that she liked me too. Shortly after, we went on my very first “date” where my mother escorted us to Hard Rock cafe and then to go see Ghostbusters II. So there, I suppose you could say that Michael Jackson helped me land my first date. My first kiss on the cheek. A Michael Jackson impersonater at least.
This was in 1989. When “Bad”, “Thriller”, and “Off the Wall” were the most important works of art in my life. When “Thriller” rarely left my cassette deck.
I was just a hair too young to really become a Nirvana fan before Kurt Cobain died. And even when I was making music, singing in bands and whatnot, I was more vocally influenced by Michael Jackson. Even though we played guitar rock. So if there is a most significant celebrity death of my generation, or at least my life thus far, this is it.
The show was called “This is It”. As in…the end. The final encore. He was closing the book. Michael Jackson had completed his work, and actually changed the world along the way. I don’t know what more can even be said about the show. It is what you would expect from the most talented, experienced entertainer of all time.
What kind of show would the best performer, with the best dancers, pyrotechnicians, video artists, sound engineers and an endless supply of money. Incredible.
One of the things that blows my mind is how effortlessly he seems to be able to project his voice. The way he can so easily command a range that most singers would have to throw their whole bodies into.
Amazing performance. Amazing performer. It will be a long, long time before anyone else can take the crown. They really have their work cut out for them. His music will definitely live forever.
I think that specifically people right around my age, who were introduced to “Bad” and “Thriller” so young, have a powerful connection with and a special place in our hearts for Michael Jackson.
Alright…seriously, that is about as emo as were going to be getting on this blog.
The point is…it was a little startling that I was not even considering MJ’s final performance over flashy computer generated “end of the world” destruction and a sequel that would have been more appropriate 8 years ago- when I vividly remember a time where Michael Jackson was everything to me. Am i officially jaded now?
I ended up seeing it, and its like “LOVE” the Cirque du Soile Beatles show…except where the star was actually in the performance. But every bit as theatrical.
I saw “LOVE” live in Vegas, and it was the only time I ever really cried for reasons other than sadness. It was more like an overwhelming sense of appreciation, and beauty. I can imagine I would have have close to the same feeling had I gotten to see Michael Jackson live.
Sex, Humiliation & Performance Enhancing Drugs
Posted by: | CommentsLet’s get right into a touchy subject. Shall we? We shall.
People don’t talk about it, but any successful player occasionally deals with two problems that are far worse than approach anxiety, and comfort building. It’s even worse than last minute resistance. I’m talking about what comes after that. After you “close the deal”…or when she is ready to close the deal, but you aren’t.
I’m talking about whiskey dick and premature ejaculation. Just because you learned how to talk to girls without pissing yourself doesn’t mean that all of the sudden you’re going to be able to to fuck her like a porn star. Or even half decently.
Sex tips are another topic altogether, and I do have an impressive collection of tips and tricks…but If you’re like me and probably most other guys, your game utilizes, and probably even requires a good bit of alcohol.
So, you drink so that you can get into happyfun mode- You drink so that you can approach- You drink to calm the obnoxious voices in your head- You drink because she’s drinking…and it’s fun…and because you’re at a bar. Then you move her to another location and drink some more. You get her back to your place and guess what…you had better pour her a drink, and one for yourself as well. Business as usual.
She’s tipsy enough to convince herself that she has no idea whats going on. Enough to use the alcohol as a rationalization for the fact that shes about to blow a guy she just met. That she never does this kind of thing. Shes not “like that” …As she lets you take her pants off. Awesome. It’s pretty on now, right?
Wrong.
Sure the alcohol helped you to get to this point, but now your pants are off, she’s wet and ready to go, and your dick is a sad, pitiful fucking embarrassment.
My threshold for things like “embarrassment” and “humiliation” are extremely high. Absurdly so. I almost never get embarrassed. At boarding school, the headmasters favorite thing to do was to try and humiliate the shit out of everyone. That was her way of breaking people so she could fix their rebellious behavior. I remember it used to KILL her that she couldn’t embarrass me. She tried every day, and when I wasn’t phased, she would try something even worse. This trait is essential to a player and just goes along with being confident and not giving a shit what other people think.
I don’t know about you, but I can jack my drunken limp noodle dick off in front of a beautiful girl for only so long before my confidence takes a bit of a nosedive. So, you get the idea. Alcohol will probably help your game, but this advantage is likely to come at the price of bafooning about with yourself in front of her, hoping you can come up with at least half an erection.
There’s got to be a better way! A way to…you know…have your cake and eat it too. Sure, you could solve this problem by not drinking…but how realistic is that? Come on now. Let’s not shit ourselves.
So I’m more in favor of a solution that allows me to do both. And wouldn’t you know, there are drugs out there that give you a herculean erection with the density of uranium, that blows the concept of whiskey dick right out the window. Imagine that. Drugs ARE the answer. I am by no means giving health advice here…I know that solving drug related problems with more drugs might not be the most conservative way to go about your day… And the cynic in me knows that anything with immediate temporary gain is probably not without risk or consequence.
Here’s something you probably won’t hear from a lot of 27 year old guys, and It’s not something I love to admit…but this isn’t about me…and one must put ego aside to create art and pursue truth…so I’ll say it…I am a big fan of ED pills and have recently become a fan of herbal alternatives. Yep, there, i said it. I have taken Viagra, Cialis, and several other over the counter sex performance enhancing drugs.
No shame in my game.
Why, you may ask, would a perfectly healthy man in his physical prime need to take drugs that are designed for 60+ year old men who can’t get it up? Well…that would be the wrong question. I don’t NEED to take them. So let’s rephrase the question.
Why would a young guy WANT to take these pills?
And my answer is simply because…um…. the benefits of being able to effortlessly maintain a rock hard erection (even if you have been drinking) and fuck her brains out like a porn star far exceed the price of obtaining these little wonder drugs. Do the math.
If you are a player, and have acquired the skills needed to get beautiful women to succumb to your will, then you will need to be able to perform in bed. It’s just the next logical step. Learning the game is really only half the battle. Being a real Casanova means that you need to give these women something to talk about.
And average, or god forbid, below average performance in the sack is not going to cut it. Luckily, we live in an era where western medicine and technology are readily available to help us overcome the burden of mediocrity. I say take advantage of it.
The game came easy to me. Delivering the goods was a problem
Here’s a somewhat embarrassing personal story. Enjoy…
When I first met Katerina (rare instance where I am going to use the girls real name) I was floored. Without having to get into all that…suffice it to say that this was a particularly significant woman, and that she changed my psychological landscape considerably in a lot of ways (”scarred for life” if you want to be cynical..)
Anyway, after diligent work to get this girl- skip to the part where we are making out on my futon…
We’re fully clothed and I’m between her legs, dry grinding away. She pushes me away, catches her breath, parts her lips and says with a quivering Russian accent…”fuck me…just fuck me…pleeeeaaase”
Yeah, I know, I wrote that with the imagery of a romance novelist…because dammit, that is one of my all time favorite memories. It was probably the hottest moment in my life. Just so happens that what followed was one of the most humiliating…
So it goes.
So I’m thinking “This is IT…I DID it!…Now for the moment we’ve all been waiting for”…
And then I fussed with a condom for what seemed like about a hundred hours, and then proceeded to give her what could probably be considered one of worlds most pathetic displays of premature ejaculation ever.
I will never forget the words that came out of her mouth…
“Have you ever done this before?”
She wasn’t trying to be mean. She was sincerely wondering if she had just taken my virginity. I was devastated.
Those words rang in my ears for about the next week. I was too embarrassed to even call her.
I run into her at the coffee shop where we met about a week later, and was just honest with her. She was hurt that i hadn’t called her…wondering if i had just gotten my rocks off and forgotten about her. It wasn’t like that at all. I really liked her.
So I told her the truth. As I often do. (Seriously, on a side note…I find that the truth really does work most of the time…go figure) And I was able to get another date with her…
And it was very clear what I had to do on this date in order to recover from the last one.
That’s right. I had to fuck her so hard that she would have no choice but to think that our previous encounter must have been a fluke. I had to literally fuck all recollection of that evening out of her head completely.
I wanted to make her my girlfriend. I was in damage control mode. And this was what I needed to do. I knew there wouldn’t be a third chance. When it happens once, “hey baby, you’re just so hot and had me all worked up”. When its a recurring event, you’re just a bad lay.
Women like this don’t have too much patience for that kind of thing.
So how was I going to be able to pull off such a stunt? Having never really been able to do so before?… And plus I’m totally nervous and self conscious about it now.
I quickly scored a Viagra from friends dads medicine cabinet and hoped for the best.
What happened next was the stuff of legends. We rented Star Wars: Attack of the Clones, and I fucked her from the previews through the credits of that film. It was phenomenal. She must’ve came five or six times, and when i finally did it was in a proud glorious eruption- it was a money shot that Peter North would have appreciated.
Far removed from the shameful two pump squirt that had occurred last time, head hanging in shame…looking at her like “….um…oh shit…I’m…sorrry”. No. My head was held high and I knew that I had just given her a ravaging unlike anything she had ever known.
…with the help of pharmaceuticals, that is.
And she went on to become my girlfriend…and my first “true love”…as well as the woman who is primarily responsible for turning me into the jaded deviant I am today. But I guess thats the role of every ones first love. Now that i think of it, I could have dodged that bullet entirely if i had NOT taken that pill and sledgehammer fucked her into oblivion. Hmmm….Interesting. Irrelevant, but interesting.
I digress.
My point is…when you need to do a job that ordinary humans are practically incapable of, there is a multi-billion dollar industry that can give you super human abilities in pill form.
I stand with the transhumanists and extropians in thinking that if there are products available to modify our natural flaws with chemistry and technology, then it is perfectly desirable to want to do so…and if there aren’t, then someone should be making them… Luckily they are.
But, isn’t that like…CHEATING?
Bro, this isn’t the Olympics.
This is guerilla warefare, and I’ll take all the help I can get.
So, that night, when I learned “Holy shit, there’s a pill you can take that makes you fuck like a rock star”, I put my humility aside and thought…”Sure, I’m a young guy and don’t NEED to take these pills, but if I can get them easily and cheaply, sure… sign me up.”
Why would I prefer to be average?…Why would I want to deal with being self conscious and unsure of my ability?
Why would I want have sex be a frustrating game where the goal is to try as hard as you can to distract yourself and NOT get off? Where pleasure and ecstasy are an obstacle to overcome. Doesn’t that seem a little backwards. Sex shouldn’t cause anxiety. It shouldn’t be intimidating. And it damn sure shouldn’t fucking end with an apology.
So to all you guys who think “I don’t need that stuff…I’m too cool for school”…You go ahead and have fun thinking about baseball or little old ladies, or trying to name all 50 states in alphabetical order. Or whatever it is you do…
I’d rather spread legs and watch. I’d rather be thinking “Yeeaaahhh! you like THAT shit?? Now turn around and let me hit it like THIS!”
Because that’s what it should be about.
(Drug fueled hedonism?)
Look, I’m not selling this stuff…I’m just saying that I have personally used a few of these products, and If we’re going to talk about all things having to do with seduction and dating, it would be socially irresponsible for me not to mention my stance on this topic. I am really surprised that I haven’t seen more (or any?) PUA gurus talk about this.
Because the fact of the matter is, after you get you’re approach anxiety handled- after you get your game down…you’re going to actually have to fuck these women. And trust me, they can be downright frank and unforgiving about substandard performance.
Unfair as it may be, they see getting off too soon as selfish. They are left feeling high and dry in the heat of the moment…unsatisfied, and will at very least, let you know that they are disappointed. Ouch. I have had women get straight up pissed.
Sometimes they are nice, and say “It’s alright” …but we all know it’s not….especially her.
She does the walk of shame out of there to go jack herself off with a vibrator, and you’re sitting in a post-coital tristesse thinking “…fml…EPIC FAIL”……
Through experience and practice, I can hold my own now without taking these pills. One does have to try hard to avoid becoming dependent on any drug that gives temporary superpowers. When you’re not regularly getting laid is when you’re most likely to have these humiliating “American Pie”-esque moments. So, as I became more accustomed to sex, and what to do with myself when I was having it, I needed pharmacological help less.
Now, I am perfectly happy to go without, and know that I can deliver the goods au natural…but there is another issue that I’d like to address here… in what started off as something I thought i’d quickly dote upon, and is becoming quite a powerful argument…
And that, my nay-saying drug free friends, is the issue of WHISKEY DICK.
I still have the occasional date where I brake the rules and drink too much…and have to deal with the embarrassment of presenting a half flaccid “whiskey dick”. This happened last not just but a few days ago. I’ve got a window of opportunity…shes good to go…and I’m fucking around with a severe case of “Can’t Get-My-Dick-To-Work-Itus”
Maybe it’s just me… But considering that Viagra is like, the best selling drug in the history of history…and hundreds of billions of dollars are spent on it and related solutions to this pesky problem…I’m going to assume that some of you guys know where I’m coming from.
Whiskey dick is a cruel, cruel joke. Oh, the irony…
Maybe you think “I don’t want to ask my doctor for ED pills because that would be embarrassing”…Well…maybe it is.
But it is a lot LESS embarrassing than a night where all goes off without a hitch- You get her back to your place, she starts blowing you- and comes up to ask “Whats the matter? Do I not turn you on?”
You fidget with yourself, trying to flex a limp alcohol soaked cock muscle to little or no avail…
You blew it. Totally blown. Game over. Or you had better eat her pussy like a champion. Like a starving boy at a pie eating contest. Your only way out of this situation is…to literally eat your way out of it.
So, now, when I go on dates, I don’t kid myself with the “I’ll just have a few drinks” bullshit. I come prepared by keeping some herbal supplements close at hand, should i have to engage in combat. And my game relies on my ability to go in with the attitude that “This night will most likely end with her wanting to fuck, and I need to be prepared”
Anything less is the same as going in with a defeatist attitude. You’ve already lost at that point. But that’s a whole different topic. What I’m saying is, I have the mentality that sex is inevitable, and that comes across in my personality, body language and vibe….she picks up on this confidence and becomes sexually attracted.
So, as sure as i arrive with my wallet and keys, knowing there’s likely to be some driving and spending…I also come with my condoms and herbal whiskey dick pills…since there’s likely to be some fornication later. Be prepared.
Alright I think i have just beat this horse to fucking death. You get the point.
As far as where to get these pills…Viagra, Cialis and Levitra are the ones you need to either get a script for or apparently you can get them online.
My opinions on specific products I have tried are as follows:
Viagra…yeah, it works…If you’re a normal, healthy guy, 25mg is plenty enough, and will basically turn your cock into a weapon for about 4 hours. Do NOT take unless you are fairly positive that you will be getting laid within that time frame. Take it too soon and you will have a raging hard on during the date and it will fuck up your game. You will come off too desperate for sex…and probably creepy.
Take it when you haven’t laid the proper groundwork for sex, and enjoy a long night of furious masturbation. Shame to waste such a glorious erection on yourself…
Cialis is pretty similar except it lasts a day and a half, but only works when you need it to. Same effect, but you can turn it off and on. For the most part. You will probably still have wayward boners that you have to have to tuck up under your belt…like you did in junior high. Get nostalgic. I’ve only tried it a few times, but if i were going to get a legit script, I would go with this one.
I haven’t tried Levitra, but don’t really see how different it could be from the aforementioned.
Then there is the bevy of herbal supplements you can get over the counter, and are pretty much available at any gas station.
Rather than go through them all, I’ll just say this…The big one you are likely to find just about everywhere is Stamina-RX. I have used this in desperate situations, and it does work, but heres the thing…
The regular dose isn’t really enough to do the trick, so in order to get the effect you would get from the more expensive drugs, you might have to double up. I’m sure this is different for everybody. Doubling up on this stuff will cure whiskey dick, but it will also give you a wicked…skull crushing headache, along with heart palpitations and a bunch of other side effects that make me think it’s a shit deal.
I have found one herbal supplement called “Control” that is all natural (mostly oyster), and works extremely well. It has effects similar to Viagra, lasts as long as Cialis (over 24 hours, but only when you want the effects….meaning you’re not rock hard and sexually frustrated all day) and it didn’t make me dizzy, nauseous or induce a panic attack.
It’s twice the price of Stamina-RX and I don’t know if it’s available everywhere…but delivers awesome results without side effects, so it has been and will continue to be my go to. I always keep some handy at home and at least one in my car.
Anyway…There you have it. My two cents on dick pills and performance enhancing drugs.
I guess as a “cover my ass” tactic, I should mention that you should consult your physician before taking any drugs…and that I read the FDA has a problem with Stamina-RX …They say that if you are using nitrates to treat high blood pressure, it can be lethal.
I realize that since I have said the words “Viagra”, “Cialis” and “Herbal Supplements” in this article, I can probably expect a hellstorm of spambots to flood my comments here…
Bring it…
And if you are a real person, and actually took the time to read this diatribe, you may as well take another moment to post a comment…let me know you what you think….and let me know that I didn’t just spend the last 3 hours in vain..
I actually do care what you guys think, so let’s get some participation here, eh?
Kiss & Tell- Madelynn. Or, Romancing the Cockblock
Posted by: | CommentsSPOILER ALERT!
All “Kiss and Tell” blogs end in blissful sex and sweet-magic-glory.
They are essentially what is known as LR’s or Lay Reports. This is are where you will find a lot of hardcore tactical stuff that Is fresh on my mind because it just happened. Rather than just talking about a concept or something, I will jot down whatever sexual escapades I was involved in last night and what needed to occur in order to me, or one of my esteemed colleagues, Wizzy or Nathaniel Dank, to get the girl.
I do not like the term “Lay Report” to describe a written account of a successful seduction…so I will refrain from calling it that. Sounds too mechanical or something. Like doing homework. However, I do have, and will continue to have a lot of brilliant stories that end similarly. With the all-desired outcome of blissful romping and consensual perversion. I think there is a good bit of value and information that a reader could take from these stories and use to further their own deviance.
Okay so last night…this is a good one. There is a girl named Madelyn that I dated briefly, but haven’t seen in 3 years because she had gone off to college elsewhere, and we just didn’t really keep in touch.
I had tried to at first, but her number changed and she didn’t have a MySpace or Facebook page, so my attempts were botched. Usually around Christmas and summer time of the years, (when I figured she would be back in town at her parents’ house) I would try again to find her number somewhere, or try to find her online. Useless. She had gotten away…
I thought she was really cool and beautiful so I always sort of missed her. It felt a shame that we didn’t get to spend more time together. And probably never will now.
Yesterday I am in the passenger seat. Wizzy Sleeve is driving. We are going down the street when I see a beautiful woman standing outside of the church right by my house. She had an elegant posture, long brown hair, and a rack that almost caused at least one car accident. I could tell she was my type from a block away.
As we get closer, I realize that she is very familiar. Standing there all done up in her Sundays best, there she is. Right as we pass, for a split second we make direct eye contact through the car window. I was overjoyed.
“Dude! Turn around! Turn Around!” I began to wail out- nearly grabbing the wheel. Wizzy didn’t see anything and was all “WTF??”
“That girl in the red dress! The girl that was standing right there! You didn’t see her?”
“Who?”
“Madelyn! Remember her from way back? That was her! I’m positive of it.”
Wizzy, being a hell of a sport, makes a U-turn and we drive back around. She is gone. All I had was a searing image in my head, and no possible way of contacting her.
I figured the best thing to do was to try and forget about it. So I just went about my day. One of the girls I am currently hanging out with Tracy, texts me around 7pm and invites me to come over and smoke a bowl with her. So I head over there, We get lifted and watch “Freaky Friday”. Nice.
Skip ahead just a little bit, my phone rings and it is her. Madelyn. No fucking way.
What had happened pretty wild. She had recognized me from inside the car, and because she was leaving church…she thought it was some kind of sign from God.
So she got on a friend’s facebook page that afternoon and got my cell number from there and called me around 9. She said she was back in town, staying at her parents’ house, and that they were out of town and I should come over. Sounds like fun to me.
I had to abruptly leave Tracy, saying nothing more than “Hey, I’ve got to go. See you Wednesday, right?”
She was cool. And a lot of the time when you’re first seeing a girl, it can be a good idea to leave abruptly anyway. Especially if you are at her place, you should always excuse yourself before she has a chance to be like “Yeaaaaahhh so….it’s getting pretty late….I’ve got to be up early…I think I’ll just take a shower and go to bed soon.”
I am also pretty vague about my whereabouts. Don’t go thinking “Oh this would be a great spot to throw in a jealousy plotline!…and tell her you’re going over to another girls house. Be cool. Weigh out your pros and cons of staying or leaving and carry on. In this case It was a no brainer. I had to go see Madelyn.
I like same night lays as much as the next guy. But honestly, you’ve got to understand that a lot of the time, you really are better off dragging it out a while and building more attraction- laying groundwork- being aloof and playing a little hard to get.
I knew that I could check out, go handle some unfinished business with a long lost old flame, and that Tracy would still be around tomorrow. Probably more attracted because hot girls are usually the ones who have to try and get guys to leave. Almost any time you can flip the script on her and do the unexpected thing, you are going to be building attraction.
So I get over to Madelyn’s house and I quickly assessed the situation and found that:
· Because of the 3 year time gap, there was the potential for awkwardness
· Her friend was there, which would be preventing isolation for a while
· Since I don’t have a car, and took a cab over there, it would be a lot better if I spent the night…with Madelyn. Naked.
I sized this all up almost immediately and went about my strategy. My solutions to these three problems were
· Assume Familiarity
· Romance the Cockblock and
· Escalate subtly but quickly
Okay what I am talking about here is that I couldn’t let the time gap turn me into an outsider. So I literally acted like that 3 years didn’t happen. At first. Of course there was later in the night when we were telling our “catch up” stories…but I instantly treated her the way I would have if we were still dating 3 years ago. I didn’t act like “Ohhh how cool it is to see you again…what have you been up to?”
I went in very touchy feely from the beginning, setting the playful fun guy tone. And setting the frame that things were no different now than they were last time we were drinking wine out here by her pool.
I assumed familiarity. When you act as if things are a certain way, you project that feeling, and it is comfortable. It creates a warm feeling and puts people at ease. Lets them be themselves.
People would much rather be comfortable than awkward and weird. And women want sex as much as men do. So I always like to put these two neat little axioms together and create an environment where I project that I am absolutely comfortable and assume she is too. From there I focus on her and stimulate feelings of excitement, passion and happiness. This dictates standards. It sets the frame for the entire interaction.
When you detach from yourself and project outwards in this state, you leave behind your internal weirdness and self consciousness. You’re able to really be in the moment and focus on her. This draws women into you like fucking magic.
Deep and penetrating eye contact is important here. When you get this relaxed unwavering eye contact down- you can almost run game telepathically. Or at least that’s what it feels like. I swear sometimes I think my game is like at least 60% eye contact now.
If the eyes are the window to the soul then I’m a cat burglar. Climbing up in there and breaking in without making a sound. Snatching jewels and rearranging furniture.
Eye contact is such a big deal. If you’re looking at a girl dead in the eyes for longer than a few seconds and you haven’t made out yet, she will almost always be like “wwwwhhhaaaat???” followed by nervous laughter. That is the sound of her feeling insecure about the power dynamic that is taking place. She is now feeling self conscious and this is a great time to go in for a first kiss.
The ability to create and maintain silences and piercing eye contact puts you in control of the situation. This gets her feeling the need to win your approval and has her concerned with what you’re thinking about. It is powerful. As soon as you hear that “wwwwwhhhhaaaaaaat?” followed by giggling, you know you’re in.
Second, I dealt with her friend by what I call “romancing the cockblock”. This is where you totally win her friend over so that she is not an obstacle at all. I take everything that I would normally do to charm the living shit out of anybody and go full force on her for a few minutes so that she freaking loves me. It is a bit of a delicate balance and probably deserves to have a lot more written about it.
I needed to form an alliance with Julie, the cockblock. I also needed her to leave before me. In any gaming situation, I always romance the cockblock, best friend, be it a guy or whatever. It is always important for them to like you. If you can get them on your side, you’re golden.
What happened was that Madelyn had just gotten a new cocktail waitressing job and she wanted to practice serving us wine. So her friend Julie and I did this role playing thing where we acted like we were on a date, and Madelyn would come along and be our waitress.
Perfect opportunity to align with Julie. Madelyn was good with the specials but actually broke a glass. And watching her fuss around trying to open a bottle of wine was like watching a monkey trying to do a math problem. Hilarious.
So Julie and I were able to tease on Madelyn about her whack ass service and joke around about our terrible waitress. Thus forming an alliance.
To create an alliance, you just need to bandy up with someone against a common enemy. Even if it is all in good humored fun. That is why “shit talking”, “drama” and “rumors” are some of peoples favorite pastimes. Slander and Shit-talking is much more a way for people to connect with each other and form social alliances, than actually having anything to do with the flaws of the one who is at the brunt end of it.
Its why “kids are so cruel”. Unfortunately alliances are formed by having mutual hatred of something or someone else. So this is just kids “connecting” with one other. Another remnant of our tribal psychology that we can only be aware of and use to our advantage. Kids being kids.
The quickest way to form an alliance with anybody is to find something you can both hate and talk shit about ASAP. So it goes. The cockblock was romanced. And Madelyn was now starving for my attention.
Once Julie and I had established a connection, I was able to tell her (side bar style) that I have missed Madelyn and thought it was amazing how we had just happened upon each other suddenly like this. I made it apparent to her that I was looking forward to finally being able to spend some time with her later. Playing catch up…alone.
She took the polite hint. And sure enough when Madelyn came back with the next bottle of wine, Julie excused herself for the evening. “Oh I don’t know if I can drink another bottle…I’ve got to do…stuff tomorrow. You guys have a good time. Nice seeing you again Chat”
Perfect. Now finally alone with her, I was standing at a crossroads where I could either fail out and have to take a cab back home at 4 in the morning, or I could get her to invite me into her bed.
Fortunately I wasn’t too worried about it. I just had to escalate quickly.
I take her by the hand and start dancing with her. Not because I am a suave dancer or anything. I am a shit ridiculous dancer. But I wanted to immediately set the tone for close physical contact. And I wanted to get that first kiss out of the way. To set things back on track.
I did and we kissed. She put up a bit of token resistance pulling away, saying “I think we’re getting too intimate for our first time seeing each other (in so long)”.
I simply looked at her, bemused and laughing a bit, as if it were a cute gesture, and said
“I….know…..you…” and kissed her again. We were getting into it, and this time I pulled away, I asked her to put on some different music and just trotted off to the backyard like nothing happened. When she came back out I alternated between paying shit loads of attention to her, stimulating her emotions with stories and relating to hers, and making out with her…steadily escalating physically (knees on a pea gravel patio) until the bed was the only decent place for us to be.
I did not have to call a cab. It was beautiful.
Here’s My Two Cents On “Attraction Formula” by Paul Janka
Posted by: | CommentsAll gossip aside, I’d like to write a fair review of Paul Janka’s book “Attraction Formula”, which I just finished. Not exactly sure why, but I was expecting NOT to like him. But as with most people savvy to the art of seduction and charisma, Paul Janka comes off as…well, quite likable. He might be kind of a douche bag. But the way I see it, that is aside from the point. The guy is a seasoned player and brings some interesting, and more importantly some unique input to the table.
At under 90 pages Attraction Formula is a solid book worth a read. For $20, I’d say check it out if you haven’t yet.
Janka’s book focuses much more heavily on getting the girl than it does on any kind of pretense of self improvement. This guy doesn’t seem to give much of a fuck about “inner game” or good interactions. He wants sex and his method focuses on getting an unreasonable amount of it. Fair enough.
Key to his game is the concept of “inventory” as he calls it, or getting as many numbers as possible and working with a list of many women rather than spending much time or effort gaming just one prospect. While I don’t really know if i like the term, it is a quality idea and undeniably helps to always be stacking the phone numbers of prospective dates.
This also causes him to stress the importance of getting contact information. I think that his point that “If you don’t get the number, nothing else matters” is a good one, that should be remembered. Seriously, you will probably not ever see this person again, so simply having a fun interaction is nearly pointless if you don’t leave with a phone number.
I also think that it was refreshing to read someone’s views on the subject who works and plays pretty much outside of the “seduction community”. And his views and tactics certainly reflect that. This is not Mystery Method or Speed Seduction style game at all.
I don’t think at any point he even refers to himself as a pickup artist. He is obviously a natural player. His game is direct. It is sexually upfront and assertive. I like that.
In some of ways, Paul Janka’s book was sort of what I was in the mood for. Being a fairly successful player myself, I tire of reading all these “How to pick up women for total beginners” type newbie books. The concept of routines is nonexistent in Janka’s game. The problem of approach anxiety is handled the best and pretty much the only way it can be handled…by getting out there, talking to women and not giving a shit.
There are a lot of products for guys who have zero experience, and need an education from the ground up…but for my own knowledge, I am interested in more advanced ideas. I found “Attraction Formula” to be a good book for experienced players who aspire to get even better. In other words, guys who are in the game for their sheer love of women and insatiable appetite, rather than say…guys who need serious help with social awkwardness and approaching.
He talks about the importance of verbal game, isolation, and physical escalation- but with a unique perspective. His idea of isolation is to pretty much get the girls number after a minute or so by going in directly and asking for it right off the bat, and then inviting them over to his apartment that night.
Janka doesn’t discuss much of anything having to do with building comfort and rapport. He seems to go right in for the kill by getting the girl back to his place. This game of overt sexual intention does work to get laid, but I have mixed feelings about how strong overall this kind of game is. This leads me to think that he relies perhaps a bit more than he likes to think on his looks. The guy is stereotypically handsome.
He also has another huge plus going for him, which is obviously that he lives in New York City. In all fairness, while his tactics are generally good, and applicable everywhere, his system is pretty much catered to NYC. Outside of maybe a few other areas in the Northeast, and European metropolises, you can’t exactly run his particular brand of day game street approach.
Right now, I live in a huge city and even still, having lived and gamed in New York, I can say that it truly is a whole different ball game.
In fact I would venture to say that the single best piece of dating advice is this:
Move to New York City. Seriously.
Not to downplay Janka and his skills, but really…a player with even a modicum of game, and the confidence to approach women, should be getting laid a fair amount if he lives in New York City.
The major pro’s of the book are the non-community views on game from a natural player mentality. Refreshing, insightful and informative. I also like that while it is sure to be of great help to a beginner get his feet wet, it does also have a lot to offer the experienced pick-up artist as well.
I also think he has some original analogies that are very helpful. Janka is very articulate and, I think he’s a pretty good writer.
As trivial as it may seem, I have to give him credit because I learned a few new words reading his book. Which is not trivial at all since I firmly believe that one of the absolute best things you can possibly do to improve your game is improve your vocabulary.
That bears repeating…
One of the absolute best things you can possibly do to improve your game is improve your vocabulary.
Your active vocabulary. Because like he says throughout the book, verbal game is the only game. Like I have heard Savoy say (something like)…”keep talking and you’ll get the girl”. I think there is quite a lot of truth to that. Assuming by talking, you are sounding moderately unique, intelligent and clever. Being well spoken and cultivating the gift of gab is fucking essential. Your vocabulary is your arsenal when it comes to commanding abstract concepts, emotional states, and vivid imagery. You will hear me talk about this again and again probably, because I know that my vocabulary, choice of words, and general usage of language serves me well every step of the way.
So verbal game, with constant physical flirtation from the start, and stacking phone numbers all day is a system that certainly will not hurt your success with women.
If you haven’t read “Attraction Formula” yet, I do recommend that you check it out, and overall I thought it was new, exciting, and a good book.
One of My Favorite Day Game Tactics
Posted by: | CommentsToday I want to talk about a day game strategy that I use with phenomenal success.
This is an attraction and comfort building method that you can use all the time to bring women into your life, and is amazing for meeting beautiful women and creating almost instant dates…with little chance of flaking.
Let’s call this the “Coffee shop - Art Show” quickstep routine.
And it is all about leading, which requires having a plan. An agenda. And providing adventures that are unique and memorable to her. Best of all this whole act is CHEAP. Practically free. When I do this, the only expenses are usually a cup of coffee at the coffee shop.
This tactic works best on Thursdays.
This is because most galleries will have the premier opening for their new show on a Thursday. Sometimes it is Friday. But very often it is Thursday that they have the “premier- meet the artist” style opening.
Assuming that you live in a city with over a few thousand people in it, you most likely have at least a handful of art galleries, as well as some sort of free publication with a calendar that says when the galleries are having opening receptions.
You should be paying close attention to these magazines or newspapers because they will provide you with a constant stream of events that you can stay knowledgeable of so that you will always be able to arrange a date on the spot, because you already have plans.
This is bringing the girl into your reality. It is leading her. Letting her tag along.
So if you know of at least one of these art openings, you can already “have a plan” for what you’re doing later that evening. This makes it super easy to create same day hookups when you approach girls at the café. Or wherever.
I like to go for a coffee shop with a patio. You can do this at any day game type venue or subway car or whatever.
Basically, you approach the girl in the afternoon and chat her up as you would anywhere else. As in all day game scenarios, her defenses are down, she is most likely alone, and extremely receptive to a cool guy like you who would like to meet her.
Don’t be fooled by the book or laptop computer.
If she were against the idea of being approached by a guy she would be studying at home. This used to throw me off a lot. I would use that as an excuse: “Oh I can’t go talk to her, she’s working on something.”…BULLSHIT. She is studying at a public venue because like all humans, she craves social interaction and has ulterior motives. She would be in a library or at home if she were desperately focused on her schoolwork or whatever. You can approach girls at libraries too! They want to meet interesting new people and are putting themselves on display out at a trendy café because they hope to attract a cool guy.
I like to use an opener like:
“Hi! Mind if I interrupt your diligent studies? I saw you looking all scholarly and adorable and thought perhaps you need to be distracted for a moment…”
If shes studying, I’ll then have her “teach me something”. This gets the conversation rolling to a natural flow. From there I just talk to her like any normal human being. When I see that things are clearly going well, I will tell her that she should join me in just a few hours to an art show. This sounds exciting and fun to her so she almost always agrees. She gets dressed up all proper and lovely and I do as well. We then drink for free for two hours and build a connection.
Having this type of plan also makes it a lot easier to get the number.
Rather than having to just say “let me get your number”, you can say something like:
“You’re kinda magical…I think I like your style. Check it out, I was going to drop by the XY&Z Gallery around 7:30 for the XY&Z opening. (mention what the show is called and what it may be about or whatever) And you need to come with me. We need to go get our culture on so we can be refined young hipsters. Gimmee your number and ill call you around 7. You know where this place is right? Its over on (yadda yadda and dirka dirka street)…Sweet, I’ve got to go run a few errands beforehand, but I’ll see you then. Cheers.”
Sometimes I like to throw in an overly dashing kiss of the hand.
Notice how I invite her to something that I was going to do anyway, rather than “asking her out on a date”. I say all of this with the internal belief and assumption that of course she wants to go to an art opening with me. It wouldn’t occur to me that she would not want to go do something fairly exciting with me.
Girls love art, but rarely go to art shows. This is because they usually don’t have friends who are into that sort of thing. And when guys ask them out, it is usually to have dinner or drinks or some standard prototypical nonsense like that. Women romanticize art, galleries and art openings, yet rarely get the opportunity to go to these events.
And guess what? Now you are going out with her on a memorable date that involves absolutely no supplication, provides plenty of conversational material, a stage for you to present your personality, and FREE WINE. Art is emotional, passionate, and a hardcore aphrodisiac for women.
That’s right. You can get giggly drunk for FREE at art openings. You can drink the same amount of wine that would cost you over 40 bucks anywhere else- for absolutely nothing.
There is almost NEVER any kind of cover charge to get in. There is often music and lots of pretty people. And it is very standard for them to provide free glasses of wine and catered food.
So here you are standing out of the crowd by giving her a unique and posh experience that builds a lot of comfort and allows you two to stroll around, talking, drinking, and getting to know one another. Touching, flirting, teasing, role playing and kino escalating, of course. NICE.
Most of the time, these things are over by 9pm, so it will usually be only natural that you two will choose to continue the adventure over at a lounge, bar, or whatever.
You just met this girl like 4 hours ago. There was, say a 2 hour time bridge in between the initial meet and the re-meet for the gallery show, so you have really only been together for around 2 hours. Yet, you already have built massive attraction and rapport, she thinks you’re unique and interesting, and you have changed venues 3 times, and changed outfits too.
You create the illusion that you two have spent a lot more time with one another than you have.
You have also, without spending a dime, have managed to project that you are a classy, sophisticated and fun guy. If you have been kino escalating, and displaying your natural personality, you should easily be kissing the girl by 9:30.
This plan is amazing because it is a cool instant date that is outside the box of normal “hey we should get a drink sometime”. There is very little chance that she will flake.
I have never had a flake doing this. I have also never done this and not had it lead to sweet-magic-glory. You are leading the whole time. Just having fun.
Just being yourself.
As an inevitable result, she will be relaxed and have fun.
She will get to know you. There are no distractions. You don’t have to deal with her friends. There are no AMOG players at art shows who are going to try to steal your woman. This is a great way to spend a concentrated few hours with a woman, show her a good time, and create a history together.
Cool thing is that these free papers with the gallery listings are usually AT the coffee shop. It is best if you check it out earlier in the week and have an agenda. There is something going on every week that you can do.
Knowing what the plan is drastically increases the effectiveness of getting her out.
Take a minute to Google the artist. See what’s going on. These local papers are a plethora of second date or instant date opportunities if you just know what’s going on and invite beautiful women to join you.
I Strive To Be Utterly Shameless
Posted by: | CommentsEmbracing Your Sexuality as A Man
The first thing you need to do to make the change toward becoming more successful with women is to get rid of ANY guilt you may have about your sexual desires.
This was a major psychological sticking point for me. I was good with women once interacting with them, but not so good at meeting new people and really bringing in the kind of reality I wanted until I got over this. There was still that part of me that was slightly ashamed and uneasy with my inner passions and sexual intent.
I felt like “a player in disguise”. Disingenuous. Like my identity was portraying me as an “emotional romantic” who was so far away from being “like all those other douche baggy guys”…when in actuality I was just coming in from a different angle. Its no secret that a man has a burning sexual intent ignited by a beautiful woman. Why was I fooling myself? I was every bit as ravenous as the rest of the wolves…
There is no shame in being human. Being a passionate sexual person.
I felt incongruous and uneasy. Why? Why should I feel ashamed because I love women? Why should I feel guilty about my distinct inborn attraction to the finer things in life?
I certainly don’t anymore. No one deserves to live in such shackles. This is one of the biggest hindrances that must be destroyed in order to become great. Once you become totally comfortable with your sexual animalistic nature, your results with women will skyrocket.
I used to have this oppressive and completely insane notion that expressing sexual intent with women right off the bat was sleazy. As if I were someone who was “above” having to go out and hit on chicks. This attitude kept me from making the first move, and almost always kept me locked in the friend zone. There was a time when i was sneaky about my passions. My desires.
Like so many guys, I was under the impression that going out and talking to women was an intrusive act. I believed that women don’t like guys who do that, and that there was a general stigma of “Lame-Jerk” that went along with approaching. I was just there “for the music”.
EWWW
It was pretty standard AFC mentality mixed with a blend of pretentious snobbery.
Excuses, Excuses.
This is another way of staying LOCKED in your immediate little comfort zone and remaining a slave to the nonsensical constraints- the nonexistent norms of “society”.
The I-am-too-good-to-have-to-go-approach women syndrome is BULLSHIT. It is an excuse to NOT go approach, and will get you NOWHERE.
Little Mr. Poet-boy looking all dapper and intriguing in the corner, scribbling in a Moleskine notebook almost never works when you don’t know anyone in the room.
I can really relate to what Tim from RSD says in his Flawless Natural DVD:
“James Bond in the club DOES NOT WORK…I’ve tried it too many times”
This snobbery and warped perception about cold approaching women, caused me to look for other ways to meet women without having to approach.
I was not content to simply not have beautiful women in my life, so I had to build a social circle, and for years I did all sorts of things that allowed me to NOT have to approach (open mic, karaoke, playing music, art shows, etc)
You can get by like this. It is certainly not the easy way.
My game was very heavily reliant on social proof and social circles. I could steer interactions any way I wanted them once I was in, but getting in was still a problem.
I was unable to get cold approaching down because of my limiting beliefs at the time about opening sets of girls.
That supremely limiting belief was this:
That being an overtly sexually aggressive man was inferior- that one must be hide this core intent…play around it.
Shrouding it with a veil of “No…I’m not like that…” I’m different.
At the center, was the belief that the two couldn’t coexist. One could not be both a sensualist, a poet, an artist, AS WELL as a man who proudly wore his sexual intent on his sleeve.
Fuck that! I don’t know where I got such a stupid idea, and can only celebrate the fact that it no longer exists anywhere in my brain.
To be ashamed of your intentions- to hide them- is creepy at best.
We need to completely ditch the idea that lust is a bad thing. That passion should be contained. That desire and instinct need to be mediated.
So I want to talk about how I was able to transform this belief so that now I project sexual energy and intention…and more importantly how i killed these feelings of guilt and insecurity that were holding me back.
And who would have imagined that it has anything to do with evolutionary biology?
You would be absolutely correct. I got into reading ol’ Dicky D when he wrote the now infamous bestseller “The God Delusion”. I liked the guy so much that I started to another book you may have heard of called “The Selfish Gene” …
At this point, having the healthy emotional and instinctual side of my sex drive handled…
I now had all the intellectual reasons one would ever need in order to come to full terms with the fact that being constantly full of raging sexual fury was a GOOD thing.
I am a man, and have absolutely every right to completely adore beautiful women.
I need not bear any qualms about this. When you ditch the “possessiveness” over your desire to come off as a nice guy- when you realize that you don’t need to hide your brazen sexual core, you are then allowed to stop being a pussy and kiss the girl.
You are set free to be yourself. Indulge in your nature. Proudly illuminate an aura of this masculine self-liberated energy and you will get her. This is the attitude you NEED in order to escalate at the right pace.
Look her in the eyes. Be in the moment with her, even in the split seconds before you say anything. Be engaged. Be fully there. Enjoy her. Listen to her. Your presence needs to be a physical presence that is felt full on. The more you completely engage her and let go of ALL the noise in your head, the more your natural charisma will be able to take over.
Don’t try and get everything over with quickly. Be fucking present, not a wisp blowing through, tossing shots in the dark. I take BOTH hands right from the beginning if possible.
Projecting a strong sexual presence from your body language, to your physical escalation with her, to what you will let yourself say and the WAY you say it, is essential. This presence is not cultivated. You can only get to it by shedding layers of built up fantasies about identity and society.
I strive to be utterly shameless
My Ridiculous Version of the “Whats That Song” Opener- Amazing Happy Hour/ Café Routine
Posted by: | CommentsAs seems to be the trend with good openers, - they start out as legitimate questions…I had heard that Sarah McLachlan song “I Will Remember You” several times one day and it was stuck in my head. I love Sarah McLachlan anyone who says they don’t is a fucking liar. Anyways i says to the girl…
“Hey what’s that song- I’ve been hearing it ALL day and can’t figure out who sings it…you know the one that’s like
‘I will remember yooouuuu……will you remeeeeeember meeeee….don’t let your liiiiiiieeieeeiefe paaass you byyy’-
- who IS that??, I know this- wait don’t tell me- i know it’s not Tori Amos, but someone kinda like her. you know that song. help me out okay you can tell me”
The “cut” part is something I added after the third or fourth time because I thought it was funny, but then i realized that with the hand gesture you make as you say “cut!”-you are actually telling them not to let their lives pass them by, as you point to your goods. So that’s like a subtle bit of Ross Jeffries style anchoring that I added to the bit after a few times…in the development of this piece.
Since, you know….Dynamic Charisma is all about bringing evolution and innovation to the pickup scene.
This is field tested, and it’s never failed to at least open nicely.
It works in quieter places. The quieter the better. The attraction is built because you are openly being ridiculous and truly don’t care what people around you may think.
Here’s why this is some moneybank stuff and so much better than other “What’s that song” openers…
First of all, you have to really sing it…if you can’t sing, even better… this song gives you plenty of excuse to be wacky, and dramatic, and girls will think it’s funny. but don’t try and get it over with. Do it unapologetically. You’re not trying to entertain them, you just had that song stuck in your head and can hardly help from singing it. You want to know who it’s by because it’s such a dope song that you wanna go home and watch the video on YouTube.
Listen to the song a few times
Or you can use a similarly flamboyant and dramatic song if you like. The 80’s songs are more like… just words that you say…like “I think I’m turning Japanese” …or whatever. No flair. So do choose a song with some RANGE. Hit the high notes totally off key. It’s fine.
You really want to exaggerate that “liiiiiiiiii–eeeee-iiiiiiiife” pass you byyy part. She knows it’s coming and you can’t pooon out. hit it hard. You’re not trying to woo them with your perfect pitch…you’re just having fun, so go as high as you can on the “Liiiiiiii”. Get dramatic. It’s fun.
The pauses are killer and you want to totally rock them. In fact the pauses are really the magic part.
Think of that common “Hey who sings that ’spin me right round like a record baby, right round’ Shit. Nonsense.
That song is totally monotone with no pauses, no melody….it’s a bass line, a catch phrase. Weak. It doesn’t let you convey half as much personality and animation.
The pauses are golden. you sing it with conviction and hold relentless soul piercing eye contact during that three second pause. It’s a two count pause but the beat is on “you” . haha… it’s amazing. You will have never thought three seconds could feel so long.
But that is the power of this bit.
That is one of the most powerful things in pickup that seems so overlooked…what Juggler calls “the vacuum”
The vacuum is sick. I am going to get on with this opener rather than going on about the vacuum but its brilliant, amazing and when done right, is every bit as great a tool to use as CF, banter, and all the rest. It seriously deserves more attention. I will write more about my thoughts on this killer, frame stealing tactic later.
So hold those pauses. Count it out in your head, or what I do is, sort of hum the one count…two count…so she knows that I’m not finished serenading her. It feels a lot longer than it really is. During that time she’s thinking “I know that song, but yeah who is that, i KNOW this”.
Her mind is much more occupied by thinking “Who is this devilishly charming man who approaches me and just starts belting it out? Am I going to have to kidnap him and force him to ravish me in my car?”
Which is another great thing about the opener. Most girls know the song but it will take them just a little bit to remember exactly who sings it. Most girls like the song and will get excited and bothered by the fact that they can’t quickly recall- because they are too distracted by the attraction you have imposed on their lives, and how you broke into their frame like a tsunami.
So far about 40% of the time they will actually say “omygod its right on the tip of my tongue” …
Which, of course, you can have a field day with…
I like to create material that specifically elicits a response that can be misinterpreted as sexual… that is something you can tool her a bit like “Heyyyy… cool it you pervert…slow down tiger”
Now you have displayed your big alpha balls, Mr. I just don’t give a fuck confidence and a bit of personality. Good job. If you havent touched her by now…why not? You’ve already sung to her…spin her around or something.
Plus…did you catch the sneaky snarky namedropping? By mentioning Tori Amos, who most chicks, even non-lesbian ones, LOVE, you are tipping off that you aren’t a total meathead whitehat wearing flipflop douche.
Seriously, anytime you can mention Portishead, Bjork, Tori Amos, Frou Frou, Radiohead, or Rilo Kiley I would go for it.
Anyways, I’d be interested in hearing how this works for you guys. Try it. Be ridiculous.
Like a lot of the other guys who’ve become pioneers in this field of knowledge, I came to the seduction community having had a lifelong interest in philosophy, psychology and the dynamics of interpersonal communication. I always knew that reality could be created by those who wanted to, and those who didn’t would have to live subject and conform to the reality created by those who did. The few will always set the standards for the rest, and I decided early on that one could only try to understand how to come out on the winning end of this equation.
One memory stands out above all others as being the turning point in my desire to study this field of knowledge- to really understand persuasion and seduction. That was the time when I met a worthy adversary, Jamie Risner. I put her real name in here, in hopes that she may read this one day. Jamie was nothing less than the single most amazingly manipulative person I have ever met. She was the owner of a private behavioral modification boarding school. More or less a Black Op research experiment parading around as a school for defiant kids.
This was some B.F. Skinner/ Clockwork Orange shit.
You know the saying “You can’t bullshit a bullshitter”? She ran a whole school full of extremely talented bullshiters, and it was literally IMPOSSIBLE to get anything over on her. I remember being in awe of her- watching her work. Watching her perform. She could induce any emotion she wanted to in anybody at any time. She had an intuition that seemed supernatural and seemed to know every psychological warfare tactic in the book.
One day she came to me at random and could tell that I was keeping something from her. She knew that I knew something. And I did. I had a little piece of info in my brain, that if I let out, would seal my fate in that place for several months at least.
She was being too nice to me, modeling her posture and movements to a motherly comforting figure. Evoking feelings of love, fear, hatred, and trust all at the same time.
She was after something. This was her shtick and I knew it. She was working her “stuff” on me just like I had seen her do on so many other students.
I had seen her get inside people’s heads every day and completely break them down.
I knew that all I had to do was NOT give up that one tidbit of info, and I would be fine. That was it. I knew she would use everything within her power, employing all of her master manipulation tricks to get it out of me.
All I had to do was withhold that one little thing. Knowing full well that she had super persuasive wizard skills, It was a struggle, but I had to play. Perhaps I did look a bit smug, with such a beautiful piece of knowledge floating in my head. While she may have been able to tell that I had something on my mind…
I knew for a FACT that she didn’t know what it was.
Everything she said was said in a tone that was both comforting and commanding. It was maybe 15 minutes later that she was able to force that one bit of information out of my mouth.
So, I know that she is a highly skilled professional charlatan, who makes huge amounts of money by basically conning people, running this circus sideshow of a boarding school/ science experiment, brainwashing confused teenagers, and will stop at absolutely nothing to get what she wants out of anybody. I knew this.
I had resisted her mind games for months, so I knew that ALL I had to do was endure the conversation KNOWING that her objective was to lure me into a comfortable trusting state where I would tell her that thing that I had on my mind. And I’m thinking “JUST DON’T FALL FOR IT! Everything she says is Bullshit….she knows something is up and all you have to do is SAY ANYTHING EXCEPT THAT”
And within 15 minutes, I had buckled under her spell and it all came out.
I remember that moment vividly, where I was just forced to understand the reality of the situation. Where I was forced to acknowledge that for her to get me to say that, when I was consciously aware that I was dealing with such an amazingly manipulative person, took a level of skill and technique that I did NOT YET understand.
I literally remember thinking “Touché Jamie…Nicely fucking done.”
I was 16 at the time. This was a moment where I really came to see that some people possess the kind of knowledge that gives them the ability to influence anyone. I became absolutely fascinated with this talent. I wanted to know all about it. I watched her interact with parents and students as she performed what was absolutely nothing less than genuine fucking mind control.
I saw her do “memory implantation” with students, where she made people believe stories that she completely made up as actual events in their lives. She could incite more emotions in a glance than a thousand pickup routines.
I was in awe of her brilliance in social orchestration, and balls out insane ability to influence others. Whether it was just to get a piece of information, or to completely reprogram someone’s entire sense of identity, Jamie had SICK GAME.
I thought and still think that a lot of what she does is a semi-malicious way to line her pockets and feed her fat ego…but one thing is undeniable: She is goddamned good.
She was a demented genius, out there using these skills for fun and profit. I definitely saw the darker sides of manipulation and hypnotic persuasion, but became so interested in the psychology of what was all behind it and wanted to understand it.
I knew that you didn’t have to use these skills for psychic destruction- you could also use them to lead an interesting life, and incite fun and happiness into, and attract those around you into your life.
Since then it has been an profound area of interest, and I know understand that Jamie had simply been using basic NLP techniques. Most of what she did was quite “textbook”. However, at the time (10 years ago) it seemed so magical. And it was. It worked, flawlessly.
I studied her in action and saw her do some unbelievable things up close, including a few that can only be described as “real live brainwashing”.
I had always just thought of things this hardcore as being in the realm of science fiction. Well, this was where I saw firsthand that this stuff is for real. I was introduced to the concept that this sort of thing actually takes place. She was rearranging people.
The school was shut down (bought by a huge corporation and revamped completely) as a result of its reputation for practicing such bizarre psychological abuse, borderline torture, and basically being a modern day Stanford Prison Experiment.
The company who bought them out is an entire chain of “Behavioral Modification Schools” called Aspen. No doubt just a different cult of similarly disturbed sociopaths who have developed this into an industry.
It was certainly a unique experience that sparked my lifelong interest in the fine arts of persuasion. As soon as I got out of there, I began reading everything on the subject. For years I studied psychology and linguistics and began to look for everything I could find on these “weird mind control tactics”.
This led me to discover the body of knowledge on the science of persuasion and influence- guys like Kenrick Cleveland, and Dr. Robert Cialdini. I was also interested in learning all sorts of other neat things like cult induction, game theory and mass control.
Wouldn’t you know, one of the first things I read was KUBARK, the CIA Counterintelligence Interrogation Manual. This document, often referred to as “The Torture Manual”, was the governments tactical book on hardcore coercive psychological warfare. Written in 1963 and declassified in 1997- it is now freely available all over the internet.
All I could think when reading this was…“Wow…This is exactly what happened every single day, note for note. She was literally using the CIA’s psychic terror manual on us NOTE FOR FUCKING NOTE. On everybody.” It got me even more wildly interested, digging deeper and deeper.
While I believe she is a truly dangerous psychopath who has chosen to use these skills to abuse children for no particular reason-
While I completely denounce the use of persuasion and seduction to intentionally harm anyone…
I have to commend Jamie (J.J) Risner for inspiring me….perhaps influencing me…
to develop my interest, and my abilities. Nearly 10 years later, I just must give credit to where credit is due. She showed me a glimpse of the dark arts, and shook my reality as far as what i understand to be really possible. The way you can command and evoke so much emotion and influence, have that much power.
I ONLY recommend using these powers on consenting adults, in good taste and with class. Don’t be a ridiculous manipulative prick.
If she were to ever read this:
Haha! You can think of me as your protégé…haha look at your little hellspawn!
Except I’m the good version. I only want to infiltrate people’s minds to about bring joy. I’m all about the love. I am afraid my skills have far surpassed yours now ….and would LOVE to get the opportunity to go head to head with you again someday. It would be embarrassing.
